Just finished rounds this morning. He is doing beautifully. They said things could not have gone anymore perfectly. Heart Rate is perfect, BP is perfect, blood gasses are perfect, lungs are clear, everyone kept telling me it was REALLY AMAZING how well he tolerated all of this. He isn’t all that puffy, chest drainage tubes will most likely come out tomorrow, they have taken him off the paralytic so in the next few hours he may start to move a little and possibly even open his eyes. There is some debate as to wether they should get him of the vent (breathing machine) asap or leave him on it so he can rest. They are going to check with Del Nido (the surgeon) regarding that. It is so good I am scared to except it. I have been so scared for so long that I don’t think I am ready to let my guard down yet. The team here is just amazing, the communication between so many people is incredible. I told this team they should post their rounds on Youtube as a learning experience for other hospitals its really incredible. The ICU nurses are incredible. The doctors actually rely on them for a lot decision making because they come to know the babies so well.
Logan’s Grandpa visiting.
Wed. Night –
Logan is still doing great. They took him off the Nitroglycerin and they have taken the IV out of his neck (which I am very happy about). The surgery that they did is going to greatly increase the amount of blood flow to the upper half of his body so he may get headaches the first week while his body adjusts. They are starting him on some tylenol now for the headaches because he will probably start moving around a bit soon. Yay!!!!
They just finished rounds this morning. They said that everything has been smooth sailing. He is still doing great. The goals for today are to get his puffiness down more so that they can start weaning off the vent. If he has a lot of fluid in his body its harder for his lungs to inflate. Most likely he won’t get of the vent until tomorrow. He opened his eyes for one second – I missed it though. 😦 He is starting to squirm a bit, move his head, arms, and feet. He can hear our voices and he starts squirming when he hears Mom or Dad. I feel like I can start to breath…
Logan holding my hand for the first time.
So we are making progress slowly but surely. They roughed him up a bit today which was hard to see. They took some line out that was going directly into his heart. The line was held with a stitch, so they cut that and pulled the little tube straight out of his heart. Yuck! He did have a bit of bleeding after that, apparently, that was why they didn’t want to take the chest tubes out earlier in the day. They need the blood to drain out. Anyway, they also put a NJ tube in. Which is the same as a NG tube (nose to stomach feeding tube) except this one goes past the stomach into the intestines. That was awful. He is already intubated in one nostril and has some other tube in the other nostril so now they added a second tube to the right one nostril. This was the first time he cried. His cry was silent because the breathing tube blocks his vocal cords but his mouth was making the crying movement and his eyes filled up with tears. It was just awful to watch. It really broke my heart. He cried like that for over 30 mn. They finally decided to give him some versed to call him down. The also had to do an x-ray to make sure the NJ tube was in the correct place and suction out his breathing tube. All of this was done within a few hours so he was pissed. Poor boy. I will be so happy when they take the chest tubes out tomorrow. He is still really puffy so I don’t even know about coming off the vent tomorrow or not. We will see. They are going to start giving him a little bit of breast milk tonight. He opened his eyes a bit while he was crying but only a crack. His little lids are still so swollen that I imagine they are too heavy to even open. But he can definately hear us and feel us. I can’t wait to hold him again.
Logan wrote this note to the Doctors.
They just finished rounds everyone says he is doing great, that he had a big operation and that he is holding up really good. He is still more puffy this morning than everyone would like (not unexpected though) so they are adjusting some meds this morning but there is no hope of weaning of the vent today because of this. They do think though he will most likely come off tomorrow. They are lowering his morphine this morning in anticipation of this (morphine depresses your respiratory system). He is more aware this morning. Moving his arms and legs even more and has been getting close to opening his eyes all the way. They had to put a new IV in this morning which wasn’t pleasant but not nearly as bad as when he was FULLY aware of what was going on. The tubes are coming out later today (thank goodness, because they are gross). They just explained when they take the tubes out they already have sutures in place that they just tighten, so he doesn’t have to get any more sticks. They just think of everything. They also said if he gets off the vent tomorrow he will most likely have to be in the ICU until at least next Tues. They don’t discharge on the weekends here so we will be here at least that following week for sure.
Can’t wait to post a picture of Logan without a breathing tube!
So yesterday Logan got off the ventilator. Yay!!! I was so happy we couldn’t wait. But it turned out to be the worst day yet. They warned us but I didn’t listen I just wanted him off the vent. The have to get him off most of his pain medication and he has to be pretty awake to come off the vent because he has to be able to be breathing really well on his own and since he body hasn’t had to do that for so long he really needed to be very awake and aware. Man was he in pain. It was by far the most awful thing I have ever witnessed in my entire life. I know it was for his well being and to get him off the vent but this chemical reaction happens in a mother’s body and you just want to kill the people that are ‘hurting your baby’. I had some crazy cocktail of hormones going because I had to do everything in my power not to punch the nurse in the face. Though I do think that she was too rough with him. They did too many things to him while he was that ‘awake’ (I think anyway). It took a long time to calm him down and to get his pain back under control. And one point the nurses got scared and called the attending to ask what to do and a pulmonologist came in and gave him a breathing treatment of epinephrine (adrenaline) because he was so upset he couldn’t even breath and they needed to expand his airways. It was awful. It was by far the worst day we have had so far. Even with the ventilator out he still can’t cry because he is that hoarse. Its like he has largyngitis or something. Its just too awful to even talk about anymore, I am so glad that most people don’t ever have to see a baby like this, thats all I can say. Only one parent can sleep bedside so Scott stayed there last night because I was to upset to be near anyone last night. I know it isn’t rational and that these people are trying to help your baby but its like your body doesn’t know, and you go straight into fight or flight mode (mainly fight mode for me). So I got a good night sleep last night and woke up to Scott calling and telling me that Logan had a great night, that his pain is under control, and that he is now watching SpongeBob Square Pants on the IPad (or as we call it, the baby flatscreen!) I am so relieved. And I am headed over there right now to see him. Hugs to everyone.